I didn't see this coming

When I started this weight loss journey I wanted it to be my new lifestyle. Prior to starting on the path to health and well being I researched and prepared myself for the change. I wanted "THIS TIME" to be different! I vowed that I was never going to go through this again. I have gained and lost way to many times.

I set the date and psyched myself that this was "IT" and the Journey began. I was so focused, so driven!! The diet changed the weight came off. A month later I started the second part of the lifestyle change and began exercising. I didn't want just any routine I wanted to RUN!! I made my mind up that I was going to do it. I mean I had never seen a FAT runner so it had to be a good all over workout. I signed up for a 5K and had the full support of friends and family. I even played little tricks on myself. I live 40 minutes from work and the gym in 30 seconds from work. I took all my make up and hair stuff to the salon where I work and left it there. I'd go to the gym do my workout, shower and get ready at work. I did this everyday, just about. 

We have heard the saying "NOTHING TASTES AS GOOD AS LOSING WEIGHT FEELS" and for me this was a mantra! The more I lost and the smaller I got the better I felt!!!! I was stopped by people and constantly told how awesome I looked and how I motivated them also. I was on a high!! I knew I would do this forever!!

Nothing prepared me for "WHAT GOES UP MUST COME DOWN"!!! I have always been very cut and dry!! Grey area's do not exist in my world lol. I must understand WHY and WHAT with EVERYTHING!!! This has made me crazy throughout my life.  Dennis likes to refer to it as OCD. It is a joke in our relationship however it really isn't funny anymore. When I set out on this journey I read an article based on a book "IT'S NOT WHAT YOU'RE EATING, IT'S WHAT'S EATING YOU"

I knew that I would have to change habits and behaviors but I didn't realize the impact of the emotions I would deal with. 

I allowed life to get in the way. It was subtle at first. I was too busy to prepare my lunch so Mc Donalds it is!! I was so busy I haven't eaten all day so Mc Donalds it is!!! I can have this cookie I haven't had much to eat all day. These were my justifications. Slowly I began to allow some of my bad habits to weasel back in to familiar territory. I took a "BREAK" from the gym then started P90X at home and quit. Now I am fighting with the same 6 pounds. It is PISSING me off!! I was so dedicated so focused and driven! How do I get back there? I still have like 50 pounds to lose. 

Today I went back to eating CLEAN and cutting out processed sugar. I am going to "FAKE IT TIL I MAKE IT"!!

I have been faithfully watching the Olympics. I have always loved them. These games have meant more to me. I get more sappy as I get older. I watch the Gold Medal winners and I wonder, did they ever have a moment where they fell? I know to regroup and start fresh again, but where is my MOJO? Dr Evil has taken it and I must get it back baby. Said in the voice of Austin Powers :)

Hello my name is Lynne and I am addicted to Mc Donalds French Fries. I swear if I never eat anything there again I will dream about those darn FRIES!!!

Just like any other addict I can NEVER indulge as I will INDULGE everyday!!!

Please feel free to share with me your motivations for keeping on track!! I am willing to try anything. I do not want to regain the weight!!!!